My Story

The chronicle of the journey from infertility, to miscarriage, to finally raising twin girls born in June 2012.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Staring at sticks

It's almost like if I don't check in on things every couple of hours, they might disappear.  So I just keep peeing on sticks to make sure shit's still happening in there.  And then I agonize over whether or not the line looks lighter or fainter than the last test.

I think we had a decent showing on day 4, it kind of faded a bit on day 5, and now it's starting to come back on days 6 and 7.  So maybe we had some splitters in there that are now reducing to a reasonable number of babies.    That would be really swell.  I desperately want twins, but I don't want to be in the position of choosing which two I'm going to keep due to selective reduction.

Of course, this is all just WILD conjecture.  A girl's gotta keep herself occupied!  Here is the stick pile I've been looking at.  Feel free to come up with your own theories as to what's happening in my uterus.  Oh don't judge me, several of you have this very same collection, I'm just admitting it.

Other early symptoms reports:

My dreams are going nuts.  Last night I was on some major cruise, I think for someone's wedding.  Somehow we got side tracked through the streets of Belgium so I was trying to capture video on my cell phone of all the decorated streets our cruise ship was going through.  It was like some weird multidimensional thing where we weren't just seeing the buildings like we were standing at the side of the ship, but rather we were inside the ship and it's like everything was being brought directly into the room with us.  For the record, I've never been to Belgium, I have desire to ever go to Belgium, I don't know why I was interpreting all the Christmas decorated streets as being Belgium, or why the hell I was on a cruise ship to begin with.

Last night's pee breaks came at 3:25am and 7am.  Good times.

I'm HUNGRY!!!  Usually a white mocha and a small pastry will last me until dinner, but that is just so not happening right now.  I've only been up for 2 hours and I'm already eating my second small meal of the day.  K finally made my long awaited for Chili-ghetti for dinner last night and I'm chowing down on leftovers.  With all the cheese and beans and beef, it's a major protein punch.  I put it away in small containers last night specifically so I would have a "go-to" meal staple for a couple of days.

I have little motivation to do anything right now.  I'm forcing myself to do pottery because I'm really behind on my quota and the deadline is, oh, now, but I'm just not wanting to do anything.  I'm even going to bed early, not so much because I'm tired, but rather because I'm bored.

I definitely have pregnancy gut.  I've been a little bloated all along and there's an almost constant tension in there.  It's very mild, but just kind of a constant reminder that I have an abdomen.

PS - K isn't in a celebrating mood.  I keep saying "I'm pregnant" and he keeps saying "I hope so!"  Poo head.  So I'm just gonna boogie on my own.


  1. Pretty much the same symptoms here but with me bleeding on three episodes. I wish you all the best Alex.

  2. Those are some pretty freakin' gorgeous sticks :) So excited for ya!

    Also? I want that chili-ghetti recipe. It sounds awesomely delicious!

  3. I STILL have my pee sticks chronicling my early pg, and the baby is a year now (yeah, gross, I know)! Congrats, I am incredibly happy for you. Enjoy the chili-ghetti leftovers.

  4. I have the same symptoms, especially the hunger and the crazy dreams. I'm only 2 days past transfer, so I'm pretty sure it's the progesterone. I had the crazy dreams and hunger last FET, too. Strangely, I have never experienced either of those symptoms before trying this year, and this is the 8th time I've done this. Have they changed the formulas or something???

    I have only poas once. What I know from poas dot com is that the tests are meant to pick up a certain amount of HCG, say 25 or 50 and above, and that's it. Some of these tests have really bad quality control, because the manufacturers know you're just going to buy another one anyway. The days that are fainter are just probably crappy tests. Any HCG over 25 is pretty pregnant! I'd be celebrating too!

  5. Props on the dancing ood. I have no theories, just hoping that first beta is high! But not too high, of course. :-)

  6. I agree that some of those tests have crappy quality control. Also, over time the color on the strips can change due to oxidation, thatswhy the instructions say to read the tests within a certain time limit, so comparing sticks taken days apart isn't really super accurate.

    How can K deny the strips? You ARE pregnant, it's not like you're making an uneducated guess on that fact. Im boogy-ing with you!

  7. so I just looked back at your last post. you said that your girls showed up at 6 days. did you test earlier than that too or was day 6 the first test you took? I'm so excited to hear your beta results

  8. Yay! I'm dancing too. ;)


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