The Temporary Club

When you find yourself in the infertility club, it's very common to feel all alone.  So we seek out other bloggers and people in general who are going through the same thing.  We start to get to know each others stories, we put their blogs in our subscription lists so we can follow along with the struggles of someone else who is struggling just like we are, we narrow our subscriptions down to the people that we like, that seem most like us, that we find entertaining.

Then, what inevitably happens?  The bitch graduates.

And here we are, passing on our "congrats!" and "OMG I'm so happy for you!" when what we're really thinking is "Fuck, she won, I'm still a loser, and I'm stuck, left behind, still alone in this fucking club." 

And then those thoughts move on to "Oh shit, am I the old pro now???  Crap, am I becoming one of those people who has years of this shit under her belt?  NOOOOOOO!!!!!  I want to be the scared newbie, reaching out to others for their expertise and advice!  I was supposed to graduate before I become knowledgeable enough to be an old pro dispensing advice!"

To every graduating bitch - congratulations.  Seriously, in my heart, I'm really happy for you.  And right next to that feeling in my heart is another feeling of fuck you for leaving me behind to wallow in this club without you.

And when it's my turn, I will gladly accept every "fuck you" that ends up in my mailbox.  You won't hurt my feelings one bit.