I have a confession to make. The last few days, I've been doing the infertility dance of stupidity.
Here's the deal. After my FET, I had a period. 2 weeks later, I had another one and we started BCP in hopes of moving forward with a fresh IVF cycle. And two weeks into that, we stopped the IVF cycle, went of BCP and had yet another period. Yes, that's three, count them three periods over a 4-5 week time frame.
At the end of that period, the hubs and I did what husbands and wives do. And a week later, I had some very faint pink tinge on my toilet paper.
And all I could think was "implantation bleeding?" That was 3 or 4 days ago. Guess what I've been doing the past 3 mornings!
Ok. The rational person in me says "I'm being really stupid here". I mean seriously, the timing of the deed was at the tail end of a period, so wrong time of the month under normal person circumstances. I don't ovulate anyway so the odds of me ovulating when my body has been put through so much crap for the last three months, yeah, no way I would have actually ovulated. And hubby's contribution doesn't do its job either. So that's three reasons why it would be absolutely impossible for us to get an accidental freebie. Wrong timing, wrong female, wrong male.
But like every other infertility female out there, I'm imagining all sorts of symptoms. Like a mild cramp across my uterus. The fact that my nose has been really stuffy the last couple of days. And I just got a McDonalds cheeseburger and after 2 bites, I went "blech" and gave it to the hubby (my tastebuds suddenly hated all processed foods when I was pregnant before).
All sticks confirm that I'm out of my mind. But this is also why I bought the cheapies in bulk. I'll probably go through another half dozen or so in the next week and absolutely confirm that my imagination is my worst enemy.
And as stupid as I know I'm being, I have a hunch I'm not the first to do this dance, and I won't be the last. What kind of infertility dances of stupidity have you guys done?