My Story

The chronicle of the journey from infertility, to miscarriage, to finally raising twin girls born in June 2012.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Been Workin!

Oh irony, how I love you when you work in my favor.

Around spring or summer of last year, when I got off my butt and attempted to move my life forward in any random direction after losing my girls, I applied for all sorts of jobs.

I got a group interview for a job that I thought I'd be wonderful at, admin at an events company.  I'm a kick-ass admin and with my theater background, I thought an events planning company would be a great place to marry the two.  My hope was to start off being the person who files paperwork, and replenishes the toilet paper in the bathroom while quietly learning the business and growing as the opportunities arose.

I didn't get an individual interview.  In fact, none of us did.  I saw the same posting for that same job a couple of days after learning that I wasn't the right candidate for the job.  Rather insulting really.  We all sucked so much that they had to continue advertising to try to find someone suitable?  It tweeked my nose a little.

But oh well.  So I moved on to my plan B.  Temp agencies!  I supported myself for years with temp jobs and got the best job I ever had (and held for 4 years) from a temp job that started out as nothing more than watering the plants for an hour a day while the boss was out of town.  Not knowing what my fertility journey had in store for me, I figured temp jobs would be perfect.  I could work, while not promising anyone I would still be around in 6 months.  Awesome!

I applied at every friggin agency in town, most of which I had worked for when I first moved back to the area 6 years ago.  Each one interviewed me, and with the exception of 1 where I was kind of a mess, they all seemed very confident that I'd be working right away.

*crickets*

Yeah, so professionally, I've been quite the loser.  That one group interview was the best I did during my push to apply at companies directly, and my plan b was doing a big fat nothing.  I've been trying to keep busy doing other things so I don't have to think about what a loser I am and how scared I am that when my kids are in school, I'll be even less qualified for a job and as a grown-up, I'm just all sorts of fail.

The last three months of course, I've had other things to focus on.  Ok, so the whole career thing isn't going to work out right now, so let's really focus on the baby thing.  Just, not worry about it.  Just, be content to be chilling at home because we don't want me to exert myself at all.  Yeah, I'm doing nothing, ya know, for my health!  And for the babies!

Guess who called me a couple of days ago?  A temp agency!  They have a 1-2 day job, it pays a few pennies above minimum wage, data entry, would I be interested?  Now that I have no interest in pursuing a job, they come running to hand them to me!  Back in the day, I usually got about double minimum wage, but beggars can't be choosers.  Of course I'm interested.  I can sit in their chair typing on their computer just as easily as I can at home on mine, so I may as well earn some coffee money in the process.

You'll never guess where.  At the company I had the group interview!  Part of me wanted to say "Uh, this might not be a good idea.  They already decided they don't like me."  Meh, fuck it.  I wanted a paycheck from them before, I may as well take one now.

I show up, smile, smile, and I'm reporting to the same woman who conducted the interview.  Obviously she doesn't remember me, why the hell would she.  And she seems to like me just fine.  This isn't going to lead anywhere of course, I'm just going to finish out the project tomorrow and I'm sure that will be the end of it.  Where could it lead?  Heading into the second trimester with twins, I'm hardly going to become MORE reliable in the months ahead.  I'd hate to be offered a job that I want only to go on bedrest a week later.

But at least with this under my belt, and having a good attitude and good feedback to the temp agency from the person I'm reporting to, maybe I'll be called a little higher on the list when more of these temp jobs come up in the next few months.  And it's just kind of nice to be back in an office and not be fumbling around like a complete loser.  It's like "Oh yeah, I DO know how to do this."  Maybe I really am a victim of the economy like people tell me I am.

1 comment:

  1. Yea I can't find a job for my life. I have been unemployed for a year and a half now. I was the last one to be hired at the last dr office I worked at so the first one to go when it slowed down. I could get any job, but if it pays less than what I am getting in unemployment payments then there is no point.

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