My Story

The chronicle of the journey from infertility, to miscarriage, to finally raising twin girls born in June 2012.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Entering Uncharted Waters

Today marks 18w6d.  At this time in my last pregnancy, I was waking up from surgery, deflated belly, and not happy about either of those facts.  This time, I'm still pregnant, I'm not in the hospital, and as an added bonus, I'm not bleeding.  

Yesterday was a mix of great and sucky.  

K had the day off so we were able to start the day with a good snuggle.  Since buying the Snoogle, there's a great lack of snuggle so it was good to catch up.  

On lovey dovey holidays like Valentine's Day and our anniversary, K tends to wake up in the middle of the night and place presents on my desk for me to find in the morning.  He overslept so he tried to sneak out to get the stuff from his car while I was on a bathroom break.  I come out of the bathroom and he's rushing in towards my desk with a stuffed lion with a rose in its mouth and a variety of chocolates.  Busted!  It was adorable.

For the most part, we just hung out all day.  We're not big on holidays and I really try to treat him like it's Valentines Day every day, so we just kind of don't know what to do differently when the actual holiday comes around.  It was also a tense day because of where it fell in the pregnancy.  Last time, the loss started after dinner on 18w5d, so ya know, holding breath.

K made a wonderful dinner of steak, lobster tail, and creamed spinach.  I'm totally spoiled and I love it!

And in the evening, my body decided it hated me.  It started having some gas pains.  Ya know, like the kind of gas I thought I was having the last time but they were actually contractions.  So I'm freaking out.  It's one thing to be a little tense that it might be a difficult night to get through emotionally, it's another to have your body play practical jokes on you to really get you triggered.  All evening, I'm watching the clock making sure that there's no pattern to the occasional gas and asking K "I was in pain last time right?  I wasn't just a little uncomfortable, I was in real pain early on, right?"

We pulled out the doppler (again) and found the heartbeats really high up.  They're pretty much in line with my belly button now.  That actually calmed me down quite a bit.  It was confirmation that it wasn't happening again, because if I was pushing something out again, we would have found their heartbeats much lower.

And here's the weirdest thing.  Ya know how I've talked about maybe feeling movement a few times?  Ok, every time I've felt it, I've reported it here.  So that's 2 or 3 times total.

So I'm sitting on the couch, and I've got my hands on my stomach.  I set them there and kind of press a little bit sometimes, just to feel the hardness of the uterus through the fat.  And while I'm doing that, I think one of them kicked my finger!  But that can't be true right?  I really don't feel them internally, but it seemed like I felt one swift kick externally?  Logic fails on that, but that's sure what it seemed like.  It felt like a pea sized pebble bounced off my fingertip from below.  Some time was spent being shocked at that.

Well, here I am.  Currently pregnant a few hours longer than I was last time.  I've crossed over from "been there, done that" to "what the heck is gonna happen now?"  I feel like I'm on borrowed time from this point forward.  I think, there's a good chance, but I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I just might be having a couple of babies this year.

Let's do this!


  1. Your chances are looking pretty good! I'd for sure take that bet. ;)

  2. Oh Alex I'm so happy for you!

    Did you get elected as a GO or at least did they put you in the official candidates?

    I'm in uncharted waters too 7w6d saw me learning about my m/c and I'm 9 weeks today. I tell you I'm super jealous of you at 19 weeks now :)

    1. Nope. After a bunch of people campaigned, someone asked what would happen if I did get the most votes. Someone who is a GO told people that I would have the most votes of someone who wasn't nominated. Soooooo, nothing would happen. People pretty much dropped the subject after that.

  3. Very cool movement! Not the gas pains, though, scary...not so cool. I hope that you are able to move forward without too much fear.

  4. Yay! You made it to the other side. I hope they keep growing and make it home into your arms this summer.

  5. YAY! I am so happy for you!!! So cool that you are feeling movement! Praying so hard this pregnancy is uneventful from here on out!

  6. Awesome news! FYI- I just pinned your ceramics site on Pinterest...

  7. Hey, Alex, you've gotten kind of quiet. Is everything ok?? Thinking of you...


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