My Story

The chronicle of the journey from infertility, to miscarriage, to finally raising twin girls born in June 2012.

Thursday, September 5, 2013

K's nightmare realized

We're old.  I'm 38 and K is 44.  Not much we can do about that, we're only going to get older.  I hang out online with a group of 2 dozen mommies from my birth board and this is the conversation I woke up to this morning.

As much as I'm feeling old, can we also talk about how cool I am that out of thousands of pregnant women, I fit in with the young, hip crowd?  Yeah, I'm awesome.

K is not feeling so awesome at the moment.  

Yesterday was one of K's days off and he wanted to get the girls out of the house.  So we went on a spontaneous excursion.  We headed out to Target to get a few baby supplies and for some reason we just always have fun when shopping together.  The girls were getting a little crabby so I sent K with the girls to the bathroom to do diaper changes (yes, there was a changing table in the mens room of Target, who knew?).  It takes him quite a while and when he comes out, he's in a foul mood.  He tells me that the girls had a meltdown and it was a wrestling match.  Ok, I accept that at face value and we finish our shopping.  

When we get loaded up in the car, he tells me what's really up his butt.  Someone in the bathroom asked if the girls were his grandchildren.  OUCH!  His age has always been a small sore spot for him, but with this back injury, he's suddenly really feeling it and it's scaring him a bit.  Then to have someone asked if he was a grandpa....K is not in the best of moods.  This is really one of the reasons we are so hesitant to consider trying for another baby.  If we do, I'll be 40 and he'll be 46.  Doable, but also a decade or two beyond the ideal.

I kind of feel that being very mature parents is a real gift to give to the girls, during their formative years.  Before they launch into life, having parents who don't do drama, who have a mature relationship, who see and respond to the world with years of life experience, that's a great model for them.  But it does mean that they are going to get jipped in their years beyond launch.  If they wait as long as we did to have their own kids, we might not be here to meet them.  They're going to face a lot of life without us there to call for advice.

I don't think I would trade it though.  To them, maturity is going to be normal.  Hopefully they will respond to the world with maturity when it's their turn, simply because that's the model of adult behavior they're growing up with.  I do wish we had more energy though.

After Target, we checked out a local park.  It's more for older kids, but we did get to put twins in a swing!

1 comment:

  1. I love you and I'm happy we have you <3


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