My Story

The chronicle of the journey from infertility, to miscarriage, to finally raising twin girls born in June 2012.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Twins Thanksgiving

Upon arrival.  Everybody has their hair done, nice clothes.
Trying something new
Pie!

Grandma wanted some sparkling cider.  She didn't get any.

The playroom is that way girls, you're not allowed in the kitchen.

End of the evening.  Shoes and socks have disappeared, mom is in a borrowed shirt because hers got covered in chocolate pie when picking up a child covered in chocolate pie, Teeny Tiny has a new outfit and her hair all undone for a variety of reasons.

I left out pics of other family because I don't know what their privacy level is.  Happy Thanksgiving!

Friday, November 22, 2013

Separate play time

I have some concerns about Middie Biddie.  She's on the late end of the spectrum in various skills, consistently so.  She seems to hit her milestones within days before or after the end of the normal range.  They are a couple of weeks shy of 18 months and only today did she walk well enough for me to think that I'm ready to say she can.  Still knocking over blocks instead of stacking them.

But while I'm keeping an eye on those things, they aren't really big concerns.  What I'm most concerned about is how much attention she's getting and whether or not she's going to feel like Teeny Tiny is favored. Their personalities are so different.  Teeny Tiny demands and goes after whatever she wants whereas Middie Biddie is far more passive.  The question is - is she really content to play on her own and to just get a different toy when hers gets stolen, or has she simply resigned herself to not having a choice?  Does she amuse herself because she wants to or is she waiting for us to come lavish attention on her because she's too shy to ask for it?

When Teeny Tiny takes one of her toys, I'll often tell her No and try to return it.  But usually the moment TT wants the toy, MB just kind of lets her have it like she doesn't care and finds something else to play with by the time I can get it back for her.  I'm not sure what to do.  I want MB to know that she doesn't have to let TT take her stuff.  In the years to come, I want her to know that I will enforce TT politely asking and won't allow her to just take.  But in practice, at least at the moment, if I try to return the toy, MB no longer wants it and now TT is upset that I took it from her.  I don't want TT to think it's ok to just take what she wants but MB isn't cooperating by wanting the toy back so I can give it to her!

Today, we decided to try something a little different and K took TT into our bedroom to let her explore while I stayed with MB in the playroom.  In just that half hour, it's like she flourished.  She walked a solid 5 steps to me.  She laughed a lot more and was much more responsive to my interaction.  She turned away from me at times to play on her own, but she interacted a lot more than when we're all in there together.  I think she really appreciated having one on one time.

We're going to try to do that for one of the after meal play periods every day.  Each parent taking one kid and playing on our own.  Frankly, it's so much easier when there's just one!  No jostling for position on the lap, no books flying at my face while I'm reading the one in my hands, no tripping over each other when trying to walk towards me.  I don't want to thrust attention on Middie Biddie when she doesn't want it, but hopefully having more one on one time will help make her feel secure that we want to play with her.  Maybe once she knows she'll get attention, she'll start asking for it a bit more.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Another burst of baby changes

After quite a long time of no real developments, the girls are suddenly exploding with new skills and behaviors.  

Middie Biddie is still kind of struggling with walking.  Basically, it seems to take her about a week to add another step that she's able to take before faceplanting.  Or maybe it's another step that she's willing to take rather than able.  I've never seen her attempt to walk across a room and fall, she only goes from one thing to hold to another if it's 2 steps away, and she'll only attempt 3 or 4 steps if she's heading towards a pair of open arms.  She is the cautious one!  But she is getting herself standing without pulling up on anything and practicing her balance a little bit.

We're doing a lot of walking with Middie Biddie holding fingers, trying to encourage her to get comfortable with the concept.  Teeny Tiny will grab a pant leg and walk around the room with us so we have a baby conga line going.  Today, TT grabbed one of my fingers and just walked around me in circles making me a little dizzy.  I was able to kind of teach her to do that dance turn under my arm.  

Teeny Tiny is running all over the place of course, no fear there.  She loves dancing just like always and is getting a little more complicated with it.  More than just random wiggling, she now seems to have a beat and she tilts her head one way while shaking her body the other way.  It's the cutest thing that she simply will not allow me to capture on camera.  I now have a ton of videos of her doing one little bop and then just wandering around the room making me think she'll do the dance again.  I got a very small glimpse of it on camera, but just a hint of the cuteness.

Words are suddenly popping out everywhere.  I'm not sure how much has true meaning and how much is just knowing which sounds go after which question.

Who am I?  Mama!!
Who are you?  Bay-bay!!
What does Clifford say?  Bow-wow (sort of)

As I taught the girls to eat and would introduce them to new foods, I would make this kind of gulping "ahh-oom" noise to encourage them to enjoy it.  Now, TT will make that noise and kind of smack her mouth with her hand when she's hungry.  It's not official sign language but it works for me!  Actual communication of desires!  

In general, they are suddenly trying to imitate what we say.  I'll admit I'm not the greatest at talking to my kids.  They say you should narrate everything you're doing to help them develop language but I just don't.  Now that they're trying to imitate, I'm doing it a lot more.  I guess I'm just someone who needs feedback.

Teeny Tiny is stacking blocks and will now stack rings on her ring stacker even if she has to walk around to collect the various pieces that have scattered around the room.  Both absolutely delight in having a ball rolled to them so that can kind of fling it back to me.  Both are obsessed with books.  The board books are getting shredded and they are constantly bringing them to me and sitting on my lap for a story.  Even when I'm reading one, the other will get another book and bring it over, often smacking me in the face with it.  Our next shopping trip will be looking for books that can't be destroyed and are soft.  I'm going to start looking like an abuse victim soon with bruises on my face from the corners of books and limping with my carved up ankle.

They're also starting to climb so we're looking at babyproofing the rest of the house and reducing the gates in the house.  It also means that they are reaching stuff on K's desk.  I'm going to have to talk to him about it when he gets home.  He thinks he keeps it clean with his stuff out of reach, but they brought me stuff off his desk today that I would prefer they not be able to reach.

They're starting to play with each other a bit more.  The other day they were giggling while Middie Biddie tried to plop a piece of cheese into Teeny Tiny's open mouth at lunch.  I think once Middie Biddie gets properly walking, their relationship is going to blossom with all sorts of games.

We're consolidated down to one nap now.  Anywhere from 90 minutes to 3 hours.

K's back isn't getting better.  I got on his case last night because he's not really doing the exercises necessary to get better.  He's not going to like it but I'm really going to become a nag about that.  Yeah, it might damage the relationship as he gets annoyed with me for a few months, but if the trade off is reducing his pain, it's worth it.  The pain itself is damaging the relationship so I'm looking at the long game here.  

Tomorrow is K's day off so we're going to go down to the Y and look at their daycare facilities and find out how to go about getting the girls enrolled in some sort of mommy and me swimming class.  My parents have offered to help with that so that the girls and I can go even if K has to work (no way I'm taking children into a pool if they outnumber me!), but hopefully this will also encourage K to start swimming to exercise his back, and me to start slimming down.  Being able to leave the girls at the daycare for an hour or so will also take away a big excuse for us not to exercise.  

I gotta tell ya, ever since having the girls, I feel really old.  K is feeling it too.  With my ankle and general aches and pains, I haven't really felt decent since they were born.  K has gone from majorly sleep deprived during their infancy to overworked and tired during their older babyhood, and into severely injured and aching in their toddlerhood.  He literally has not had 1 full day of feeling good and full of energy since they got here.  It's worth it of course, but ugh!  We really should have met and started our family about 10 years before we did.  No, I take that back, maturity is awesome.  What we should have done was found a way to exchange these bodies for nice healthy younger versions.  But I guess the warranty has expired and we're stuck with what we've got.

Friday, November 15, 2013

A rough 24 hours

I'm a little high on pain pills so I might pointlessly ramble.  Then again, that kind of describes this whole blog doesn't it?

I'm not sure how we got through yesterday.  I was only about 50% here due to the issues with my ankle surgery.  The initial numbing had worn off so the pain started, and I took one pain pill which apparently gets me pretty high.  So I was in and out of bed all day yesterday.

The big problem was that K got some sort of bug or food poisoning or something that made him vomit for 24 straight hours.  All of the vomiting destroyed his back, either muscle spasms or inflammation, crap I don't know.  The point is he could hardly walk and when he did, it was generally a dash for the bathroom.

I had to decide which version of out of action I wanted to be - in pain so I couldn't walk very well, or not in much pain but high as a kite.  Other than the one pain pill I took early in the day, once that wore off I opted to go ahead and be in a little bit of pain but remain able to drive should Mr. Vomitman need a ride to the ER.

There was some fear as we struggled to take care of the girls while neither one of us were fully capable.  Fortunately Teeny Tiny can walk now and Middie Biddie can walk when holding our fingers so we were able to get through the day without having to pick them up and carry them much.  I suspect I'll be making them walk most of the day tomorrow when I'm on my own again.  I'm just not comfortable carrying them when I'm not walking well.  I'm not exactly coordinated on a good day.

So anyway, yeah, lots of vomiting yesterday.  I was getting pretty scared after the girls went to bed because K hadn't been able to keep down so much as a sip of water in 24 hours and had a headache.  I made him some broth and it took him about 10 minutes to sip about a teaspoons worth and even that came back up.  By midnight, he was in a lot of pain from his leg and feeling like crap from dehydration.  He wouldn't go to the ER though, and I don't think he was dehydrated enough to warrant a trip, but there was quite a bit of debate about it.  He was eventually able to keep down half a popsicle.

This morning, he was feeling a lot better, but his leg was hurting so bad (an extension of the back injury) that he really needed to take some pain meds.  Since we're on the same meds, only one of us gets to take them at a time.  So I headed out to the store to stock up on Gatorade and chicken soup.

Got to take advantage of my snazzy temporary disabled parking pass and I used one of the scooters in the store.  I know they are there for people who are injured like me or who are more permanently disabled, but I was still embarrassed using one.  Honestly, the embarrassment is because I'm such a fatass right now that I was kind of afraid people wouldn't see the surgery shoe on my foot and would just assume I was being fat and lazy rather than having a legit need to scoot.  But if not for my fat ass making me embarrassed, those things are pretty fun!

K is pretty much back to normal as of this afternoon so I've taken some pain meds.  I'm healed enough that I should be fine tomorrow without them.

Gratuitous kid pick of Teeny Tiny photobombing Middie Biddie, because why the hell not.

Oh yeah!  I've gotten some Christmas ornaments listed in my shop.  Take a look and tell me what you think!  I have more that I just haven't gotten around to listing so go ahead and ask me if you see something that you might want in a different color or something.