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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Welcome to Hell Week

Well....here we are.  I'm now 36.  Taking birth control pills as my first step to the FET.  Due date in 3 days.  Mother's Day in 4 days.

I'm not as bad off as I thought I would be.  My birthday turned out really well actually.  I interviewed for a job as a potter (I know, doing pottery and getting paid for it!), I think it went really well so I actually spent my birthday in a really good mood.

Just tired and cranky today.  Not falling down sobbing, not fully functioning.  It's just kind of a weight I'm carrying around with me. 

That feeling of "I'm supposed to be this big but instead I'm that big" is starting to fade.  I think a lot of my grief is fading with it.  I make no promises that this current feeling of "meh" will last, but that's what I've got right now.

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